Time did not wait for me, it was you who forgot to take me away. My left hand is a firefly that can remember everything at a glance, and my right hand is a long meditation of ten years.
Positive thinking leads to a positive life, negative thinking leads to a negative life.
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. All great novels will eventually point to one direction, nothingness. All lives have a common outcome, dreams shattered, people dead....
Yesterday, I underwent surgery to remove one of my organs. I want to share my story about what happened, hoping it might be helpful for everyone, especially for founders and builders who are tirelessly working on their startups, to appreciate their health.
I’ve been working tirelessly since 2017 on Aave and later Lens and Avara. My normal working hours have been a minimum of 12 hours and often more for years. I’ve taken holidays here and there without fully disconnecting from work. I didn’t mind because I love what I’ve been building, and my focus has been on creating a more accessible, fair web that benefits all.
That being said, I rarely thought about my health, especially with all the travel and moving countries in between. During the early days of Aave (then known as ETHLend), I moved from Finland to be closer to our new office in Switzerland. My diet changed completely with the move. I remember one particular day at the office, after a heavy lunch, finishing some work that evening with Emilio (current VP Engineering at Aave Labs) on Aave V1. We were about to leave to see his band, where he was the drummer, play a gig.
While helping to move the drums, I started to feel radiating pain in my back, which I thought was muscle pain or from sitting too much. The pain got so bad that I could not stay put that night. It was gone the next day, and I thought it was over.
I didn’t go to the doctor as I had a full schedule that week and some upcoming events the week after. We were grinding and talking to every user we knew to understand better how we could build a better product, and everything else for me was secondary. We launched Aave V1, and over time it became a success as we kept working hard.
Later in 2019, I decided to move to London as we found it an appealing location for the team. I kept getting the back pain regularly, and it was so strong that OTC pain meds didn’t help at all. One time, I had to call an ambulance in the middle of the night, which took me to E&A. Nothing was diagnosed at that time, and the GP recommended seeing a specialist for an MRI scan. I stupidly neglected it, explaining to myself how busy I was. It feels to me that crypto works around the clock, and since messaging moved more to instant messaging combined with all the time zones, it easily feels like work never ends. There is constant pressure for everyone in the space, whether chasing liquidity, users, PMF, or something else.
Over time, these attacks increased, and I tried to “deal” with the condition myself until my partner, Paris, demanded I seek care. I went for an MRI and discovered there was a large enough gallstone in the gallbladder that could not pass or could get stuck after passing from the gallbladder. Knowing this, I now had relief about narrowing down what my problem was, and the cure was either completely changing my diet or surgery. I neglected the idea of surgery as it would take time, and I felt too occupied. I tried to deal with it myself again. I stopped drinking alcohol completely, had my last beer last year, and even stopped coffee, switching to tea.
All these dietary changes helped for a while, but things got worse. I started to have more frequent attacks with significant pain in the back and abdomen, leading to frequent trips to E&A and doctors. The final straw was this Monday when I had the biggest attack and almost fainted. We scheduled surgery for the same week in London with a good doctor under anesthesia using keyhole surgery.
I was lucky to have the surgery done as we discovered that my gallbladder was completely wrecked. It was infected, inflamed, and pouring blood, potentially even risking pancreatitis if the stone had blocked the duct passage.
I was discharged the same day and am now resting to get back in shape for next week to be at full capacity. It annoys me how naive my approach to my health was. My problem wasn’t necessarily the hours I put into the business over the years but the lack of hours I dedicated to my personal health, especially given how smoothly the surgery and whole process went. I also don’t believe anymore after my experience that founders and builders can achieve the best outcomes if they are not fully healthy.
I hope this can be a reminder to everyone that success is measured in the longevity of constant output, and to have longevity, you need health. There is no other way around.
I want to thank everyone, especially my partner @paris, who has been supportive during this long and eventful week in my life. ❤️🩹
Going to present the first opening talk today at EthCC on 10:25 am. Topic will be Power to The People.